Breakthrough

I had a breakthrough last night during our Sozo class. They asked us to search deep inside and ask God to show us what is keeping us from certain things we wanna do. Basically Sozo ourselves. I started with something simple and when he showed me I was like WOW. It all made perfect sense. OK my issue has always been 'praying for others' not being able to say what needs to be said. Feeling unworthy to be up there, but he told me yesterday how can I help pray for others when I my self don't ask. Like before when they did Altar call I wouldn't go up to ask for anything because I don't know what to ask for. I never liked asking for anything, I figured if some one wants to give, then they will. I just realize maybe I'm afraid of rejection so I rather not ask..hmmmm..I pray all the time but I'm not specific on what I pray for. I pray for him to protect my son, my family, to keep us from temptation etc etc, but I never ask for like a better job or a better car or ummm I don't know my own place. I feel like if I ask for all those things or anything to benefit ME then I'm being selfish. I guess what he was trying to tell me was that how can I do it to others when I have never experience it my self. At Altar call people will tell me what they want prayer for and all I have to do is come in to an agreement. Funny I have heard all this before but I didn't understand it until God broke it down for me. How awesome is He!

Focus

NUMBERS 14: 3-4 "Why has the LORD brought us to the land to fall by the sword, that our wives and children should become victims? Would it not be better for us to return to Egypt?" So they said to one another " Let us select a leader and return to Egypt"

God will never trick you into something that might harm you. Everything He does is to benefit us because He loves us. He heard His children's cries and delivered them from Egypt but all they did was complaint on how "bad" they have it now and yet forget how bad they had then. It is easy to forget where we came from and take what we have for granted. Even thought our past does not define who we are, we still gotta learn from it. I'm sure they were scared to go forward and that's why they complaint thought the years. Its hard to follow something you cant see and thought they had the promise right around the corner, it was hard for them to see tomorrow. Our promise has always been right there for us to grab a hold of but we chose to make it harder on ourselves by not focusing on God.We consume all of our energy in whats going on around that we miss whats right in front of us. For some of us today its easy to fall back into the world, to go back to our old way. God never intend to make them walk around the desert for 40 years. If they would've only listen to Gods word instead of themselves they would have made it to the promise land sooner. That basically applies for us today. God is anxiously waiting to give us our promise but since we aren't 100% committed to him we keep falling short.

Father I pray that you keep my eyes fixed on you and not on my surroundings for I don't wanna take 40 years for my promise. All though times are rough right now I thank you because I have you to fall back on. Thank you for all the love you have for and for showing yourself to me when u did. I love you!! Amen

ON FIRE

I'm so fired up right now I feel like AHHHHHHHHH...lol. Man I was so filled with the Holy Spirit from the minute I walked into worship during first service till the end of the second service. It was so outta my control. God was working me and I loved it. I didn't fight it, I didn't care about anyone there but God and me. We had a guest speaker and his wife at church and they were good. They had a good word and it explained a lot to me. They pretty much prayed for every individual there. His wife gave me a word but I was so consumed with the Spirit of God that I cant really remember what was said. I kinda remember her saying something about my hands and she made sure to put an emphasis on HANDS like telling me I have 2 hands and I was gonna do great with both and I had no limits. I really don't have a problem with it ....now.... but it took a lot of pain growing up for me to get here. I had been laughed at, called "hang lose", pushed of the bike like 5 times just for being different. Having little kids spit on my face for just no reason at all. Those are just a few. Until one day it hit me and I didn't care anymore. Its true when they say God will turn your weakness into strengths. I love that I'm unique. Really I'm one of a kind and He takes pride in the way He made me. I am capable of doing anything every "normal" person does just tweaked a little and better...lol...anyways to sum it all up God is so AMAZING...

You are WORTH dying for...

So here's the scene,
He's on the Cross, doing the will of the Father and number one thing on His mind... is you.
Yep, Jesus went to the Cross because
1) He was gonna do the will of God and
2) He wanted you to be able to have the relationship with Him desired. Jesus...
He took it ALL for YOU!!! Every beating He got was for you. He didn't care that it hurt, He wanted to set you free. See Jesus wants you to understand that through all the pain that He went through it was worth it. Jesus says this to you, "You are WORTH dying for!!" See the thing that we sometimes forget is Jesus already knew who wouldn't love Him, who wouldn't believe in Him, who would betray Him, yet even when He knew that He still took it all on the Cross for you. None of us deserve what Jesus did/ does for us. But the fact of the matter is He did all for us. Don't let people tell you that you are worth nothing. Don't tell yourself that you are worth nothing because it's not true!! Just ask Jesus, He knows! love ya'll!


Now those of you who know me, know that i didnt write this and your right i didnt ..LOL... but it was just so powerful to me that i had to share with others.

Short and Simple yet Powerful

Lord, here I am to serve you. I love you and without you I'm nothing. You go before and your hand is in everything I do. I want more of you, so I will continue to seek you until you and I are one. I wanna be at that next level with you and I am ready for whatever you have in stored for me. Take my heart for it belongs to you now. I love you

Sincerely yours

In His Presence

Yesterday was a powerful day for me. After the 11 o'clock service I went home to find that certain people I live with were talking behind my back. I felt betrayed, angry, I just blew it. I didn't tell them anything but I was just so full of anger that I decided to go to the 5 o'clock service in Spanish. As I walked in the room I walked in to the presence of God. It felt as if he was just waiting for me to arrive. I broke down. I have only experience that encounter a couple of times before, but yesterday was different. He was there holding me, taking my pain away, showing me his beauty. I was stuck, the only thing that I could say was " I love you" over and over again. As I kept worshiping him I felt his presence get stronger and stronger and then all of the sudden there was a moment of peace with in me, my anger was no longer there, I was full of his love. Then pastor James started preaching and I felt how he was just speaking to me. He said something that just got to me, he said " Jesus is in the business of changing hearts" . Just like he changed my heart around, he will change theirs, and I should just leave it up to God. I must be doing something right and going in the right direction if the enemy is trying to bring me down that bad. This isn't the first attack and as I continue my walk with God it wont be the last. This attack only made me want God more. I wanna have more of those encounters with him, I wanna be in his presence every second of my life, He is so amazing. I love it because as I sit here writing this I'm trembling and I feel full of joy.



God I thank you for last night experience I hope that it wont be the last. I thank you for feeding me what you have and still be hungry for you. I don't wanna settle for this level in my life and I pray that you take me to the next level in my life in Jesus name Amen.... I love you